PUSHES FOR QUICK INVOLVEMENT: Comes on strong, claiming, "I've never felt loved like this by anyone."
JEALOUS: Excessively possessive; calls constantly or visits unexpectedly; prevents you from going to work because "you might meet someone."
CONTROLLING: Interrogates you intensely (especially if you're late) about whom you talked to and where you were; keeps all the money; insist you ask permission to do anything.
UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS: Expects you to be the perfect mate and meet his every need.
ISOLATION: Tries to cut you off from family and friends; accuses people who are your supporters of "causing trouble."
BLAMES OTHERS FOR PROBLEMS OR MISTAKES: It's always someone else's fault if something goes wrong.
MAKES OTHERS RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS FEELINGS: The abuser says, "You make me angry," instead of "I am angry," or says, "You're hurting me by not doing what I tell you."
HYPERSENSITIVITY: Is easily insulted, claiming hurt feelings when he is really mad.
CRUELTY TO ANIMALS AND CHILDREN: Kills or punishes animals brutally. Also, may expect children to do things that are far beyond their ability (whips a 3-year-old for wetting a diaper) or may tease them until they cry.
"PLAYFUL" USE OF FORCE DURING SEX: Enjoys throwing you down or holding you down against your will during sex.
VERBAL ABUSE: Constantly criticizes or says blatantly cruel, hurtful things; degrades, curses, calls you ugly names.
RIGID ROLES: Expects you to serve, obey and remain at home.
SUDDEN MOOD SWINGS: Switches from sweet to violent in minutes.
PAST BATTERING: Admits to hitting a mate in the past, but says the person "made" him do it.
THREATS OF VIOLENCE: Says things like, "I'll break your neck," or "I'll kill you," and then dismisses them with, "I didn't really mean it."